Kalopsia
by DefiantDreams
Summary: Kalopsia: the delusion of things being more beautiful than they are. / Shisui doesn't find Haruno Sakura beautiful. ShiSaku NonMass AU


At 12 years old, Haruno Sakura was barely worth any mention.

"Sasuke's teammate," Itachi told him and Shisui glanced at her. His eyes slid right past her.

She was pretty enough. Hair too long and eyes too bright to be a proper kunoichi, much less a proper shinobi. People who had long hair-Itachi, the Hyuuga, as much as the Uchiha hated to admit it, even Godaime-sama and the Shodaime-needed the skills to back it up, the assurance that the enemy would never even come close enough to use their hair against them. Shisui scoffed and tossed a kunai straight up into the air before he caught it and swung it around his finger.

As he watched her pathetic attempts at sit-ups, he shook his head. She definitely didn't have the skills to back it up.

She wasn't going to last. Either she was going to die or give up before she even reached Chuunin. She'd be a pretty civilian, he granted. He'd give her that. She'd have the chance to be beautiful with her ineffective diet and slim body, and her hair that was just easy picking and stood out far too much.

He doubted she wanted to be anything but beautiful.

And so, only months later, just after the second stage of the Chuunin exams, Shisui paused in surprise at the sight of pink hair sheared short.

She looked haggard, her hair uneven, her red dress ripped and covered in mud and grass.

But there was a triumphant look of pride on her face. The look of a survivor.

Shisui tilted his head to observe her before he nodded.

Maybe there was hope for her yet.

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At 13, Haruno Sakura is abandoned by her team.

Naruto, the Kyuubi jinchuriki, was planning to leave the village with one of the sannin. Sasuke had asked Shisui to train him and had joined the Uchiha Police Force.

Team 7 was disbanded.

When Shisui and Sasuke come back, he didn't quite know what's become of the remaining member of Team, and honestly, he didn't even really think of her beyond a passing thought.

He was injured, and unlike the older generation, he didn't mind going to the hospital. The cute nurses definitely made up for being prodded and poked.

Unfortunately, it wasn't a sexy nurse that came in to treat his shoulder and the cut on his face. It was the farthest thing from sexy nurse.

Instead, he got Haruno Sakura. He pouted inwardly. At 15, she still had barely any curves to speak of. She was starting to grow into her too large forehead, but barely just. She could do with a better haircut too. The uneven cut was cute when she was a genin straight out of the Chuunin Exams, but she really should have gotten it fixed by now.

"Sasuke's fangirl," Shisui greeted with a grin. She glared at him. It's not an attractive look on her.

"Itachi's tag-along," she sniped back and Shisui's eyebrows shot up. He let out a short bark of surprised laughter. The little flower had thorns after all. He appraised her, tilting his head.

"So you're a medic now," he continued and she gave him a suspicious look before slowly, she nodded.

"Yes. I trained under Tsunade-shishou. I'm going to touch your face now," Sakura said, voice cool. She reached up, and it was only because of her warning that Shisui didn't flinch away or slap her hand. Even until now, he didn't like it when people's hands went near his face. He stayed stock still, body tense as she removed his hitai-ate and blindfold, revealing his empty eye-socket and the cut right beside it.

He watched her expression closely, something close to satisfaction hitting him when she didn't even flinch or look disgusted. It was long healed already, but Shisui admitted that it still looked a little gross.

She healed the cut that went high up his cheek, curving into his ear. He had been distracted, a costly mistake. He wouldn't make it again.

She pulled her glowing green hand away and Shisui leaned back to peek at himself in the mirror. He touched his face and nodded contentedly. No scar.

"Good enough for the great Uchiha Shisui?" Sakura asked, her eyebrow raised in challenge, as if daring him to find fault in her work.

"Pettiness isn't pretty on you," Shisui told her matter of factly. Her lips thinned.

"Pretty isn't really something I aim for," she replied. Not anymore, she left unsaid, but Shisui heard it anyway.

He smirked. "Good. It didn't suit you."

He should have expected it when in return, Sakura doesn't numb the pain before she resets his shoulder. He bites in the surprised yelp, unwilling to give her the satisfaction. And yet, when she pulls away, she had a self-satisfied, smug look on her face anyway.

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It doesn't surprise him that Sakura dislikes him. He's quick to tease and she's even quicker to anger. Their conversations are a back and forth of sarcasm and biting remarks that are half-meant.

Shisui finds it amusing. Sasuke less so. And Itachi? He's far too used to Shisui's antics.

But still. It gives great moments like these:

"Maybe if you could actually hit something, that strength of yours would be useful."

Sakura's head snapped to face him, a furious glare on her features. Shisui's eyes widened as she ripped out a tree from the very ground and then swung it at him.

Her temper was unattractive, and he understood why most shinobi her age was turned off by it. They couldn't handle her at her worst and hell, maybe Shisui couldn't either, but he found it too fun to rile her up.

He needed some excitement in his life and Sakura just so happened to give it to him.

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Seeing her heal a measly cut on his face and reset his shoulder was nothing compared to seeing her on the field.

He'd admit it now, he doubted that she'd be able to keep up or that she'd actually be useful.

He took it all back.

She was pretty useful when she was keeping him from bleeding out in some no name village.

He grinned at her, teeth bloody, but she ignored him. She wasn't very pretty from this angle. He could see everything though.

Determination shone in her eyes as she pushed chakra into him and knitted the hole in his chest back together. The lines of her face were hard in concentration, her eyebrows drawn together and her lips thin. Her sweat stuck her hair to her forehead.

He glanced down and watched with muted interest as her bloody, gore-filled fingers glowed green and kept him alive.

She wasn't pretty like this, but damn was she competent. She was talented, and damn good at her job. He could see now why people called her the second coming of Tsunade.

His life was in her hands and Shisui trusted her with it.

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There were many things the Sharingan was good for. Photographic memory, was one, and attention to detail was another.

And so Shisui saw it all: Sakura's face tomato red underneath the dirt and clashing terribly with her hair mussed and filled with sticks, her nostrils flared unattractively, and the blood dripping from the cut on her forehead.

"She's beautiful," Naruto sniffed, wiping a dramatic tear from his eye.

Shisui gave him an incredulous look. No, she wasn't. She was the farthest thing from beautiful right now.

Haruno Sakura was fierce and raw, righteous anger with the strength of thousands, the very epitome of a shinobi. Shinobi didn't have the time to be beautiful, and so neither did Sakura.

At 19, Haruno Sakura wasn't pretty or beautiful. Beautiful didn't give justice to the fire in her eyes, didn't even come close to describing her passion or the will of fire that burned deep inside of her.

She was deathly scary and fiercely strong. Shisui had no need for fragile, beautiful things. She was no longer the weak, materialistic girl who only cared about her hair and her crush on his cousin.

She was a woman, and he was only seeing it now for the first time. He wanted her.

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"Yamanaka Ino."

"Smash!" It was a definite agreement from all the men at the table, a gaggle of chuunin and jounin.

"Haruno Sakura."

"Mhmm, pass," a jounin said snidely. "Bitch is flat and probably a prude."

Chuckles rang through the table.

"She's a good kunoichi, but that's all she's good for. She wouldn't make a good wife, that one," the man beside him agreed, nodding sagely.

"We're just talking about if you'd fuck her, not if you'd marry her, kami."

"Hey, I'd fuck her. She'd probably be wild in bed. I bet I could put her in her place."

The group of men laughed at that, their drinks clinking on the table and the sound of their cheer echoing through the bar.

"Excuse me?"

Shisui hid his smirk behind his cup as he watched Sakura glare at the group of men. From beside him, Izumi shook her head.

Neither of them were surprised when Sakura laid them all at the ground, righteous anger and flaming temper personified.

Haruno Sakura took no shit.

This was the second time this month that Shisui had seen this fierce side of her, and it only strengthened his desire for her. None of the men here could handle her, and maybe it was because Sakura didn't need to be handled in the first place. They didn't deserve her.

Shisui put his drink down and grinned mischievously at Izumi. "Sorry," he apologized, and waved. Izumi rolled her eyes and let him leave.

Shisui made his way to Sakura whose foot was on one of the men's cheeks, pushing him down on the floor.

"Sakura," he greeted. "Having fun?"

"Why?" Sakura replied, raising an eyebrow. "Want a turn, Uchiha? Sign right up, I have all night."

Shisui glanced at the man on her foot and then looked back up to meet her eyes. "Let's save that for the second date."

"Second date," Sakura repeated incredulously.

"Oops," Shisui said, totally unapologetic, and winked. "Guess I got ahead of myself. Can I buy you a drink then?"

Sakura huffed and took off her foot. "That's a good place to start."

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Not much changes when they start dating.

The sarcastic back and forth stays, and it's a refreshing difference from the overly sweet words that Shisui's gotten used to with other women. The empty flattery, words he didn't mean? None of that with Sakura.

"Does this look okay?" Sakura asked him worriedly, smoothing down her tight dress.

Shisui tilted his head and then shrugged. "Sure. Would look better on my floor though."

Sakura gave him a blank look and then tossed him her purse. "Just for that you can carry my bag."

Shisui gave an exaggerated gasp, covering his mouth. "Haruno Sakura can't carry her own things? What a scandal."

"How old are you again?" Sakura teased, grinning. "Who's robbing whose cradle here?"

"Hey!" Shisui barked, laughing slightly. "You're 19!"

Sakura shook her head as she walked by him, giving him a coy look over her shoulder. "Yeah and when you were 19, I was 11."

Shisui sputtered and Sakura only laughed at the look of horror on his face.

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"Ugh," Sakura grumbled, tugging at her white skirt. "I look so haggard, Shisui."

"You do," he agreed easily and Sakura gave him an affronted look. He grinned at her, "But don't worry. I'll grace you with my presence anyway."

"I'm honored," Sakura snarked and Shisui laughed.

"You should be!"

Sakura sighed and rubbed a hand through her slightly greasy hair. "But really. I kinda just want to go home and sleep."

Shisui pursed his lips thoughtfully. Sakura closed her eyes and yawned, face scrunching up unattractively. Her eyes shot open when abruptly, Shisui wrapped an arm around her waist and started bringing her to a different direction.

"Where are we going?" Sakura squeaked.

"Your house of course. It's nearer."

"But what about food?"

"We'll drop by that tempura stand on the way and get take out."

"Oh," Sakura said dumbly. "And then sleep?" She said hopefully.

Shisui wrinkled his nose. "Take a bath first, I don't want to share a bed with you, stinky."

Sakura scowled and then pressed up closer to rub herself against him. "What?" She sang, "What did you say?"

Shisui tried to push her away, laughing loudly and his face scrunched in mock disgust. Sakura only latched on harder, her leg coming up to wrap around him.

"Oooh, guess who smells stinky now, asshole," Sakura gave an exaggerated sniff and Shisui gasped. He hoisted her up and Sakura wrapped her arms around his neck, giggling into his ear.

"Okay, new plan," Shisui sniggered. "Take out, then while you're eating I'll draw us both a bath."

"Definitely one of your better plans," Sakura muttered and dropped her head onto his shoulder.

Shisui shook his head in amusement. Only a few moments later, Sakura's breathing evened out, light snores tickling Shisui's ear.

"Hmm," Shisui murmured to himself. "Sleep first, then when she wakes up I'll have food ready and then we'll eat."

They end up sharing a bed anyway. Shisui actually doesn't mind that much. He loved his smelly girlfriend.

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Sakura was an ugly crier. Her face got all red and splotchy, snot dribbled out of her nose, and she was loud about it too, thick sobs that encompassed her whole frame.

Shisui sighed and cradled her in his arms, patting her back. She cried into his shirt, tears staining the high collar. Shisui winced slightly at the thought of snot on his his shirt but shrugged it off. He tilted his head to press a kiss at her temple and Sakura seemed to cry even harder at that.

She pulled away after awhile and wiped the fluids leaking from her face. When she saw what happened to his shirt, she whimpered and tried to wipe at the wet stain she had made on his front.

"Sorry," she choked out, "I'm sorry."

"My shirt will survive," Shisui's lips curled up in a small smile, "I'm more worried about you, honestly."

She sniffed and wiped at her eyes. "Worried? Uchiha Shisui? Really?"

"Hey," Shisui chuckled. "I worry about you all the time."

"I don't need you to worry me about me," she grumbled and Shisui only raised an eyebrow. He poked at her nose.

"Someone has to."

Sakura's shoulders slumped and she sighed, pressing her hands to her face. "You must think I'm so stupid," she murmured. "It's not the first time I've lost a patient and it won't be the last."

Shisui's lips twitched and he reached out to stroke her hair.

"It just shows you care. I love that you still care deeply about your patients," he said quietly.

Sakura was an ugly crier, but her heart was beautiful.

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"It must be hard with your sense of direction, never being able to find your way to a decent pickup line."

"It must be hard with a face like yours," Shisui smirked. Sakura waited for the second part, but when she realized that was it, her face twisted.

She pouted. "Good thing you're not dating me for my face then."

"Good thing you're not dating me for my pick-up lines then," Shisui shot back. Sakura rolled her eyes and Shisui giggled, covering his mouth as he laughed at his own joke.

Sakura sighed. "But really though, you've been with so much prettier girls." She didn't say it as if it was a question, or as if she was looking for assurance. It was a statement by itself.

"I have," Shisui agreed. Sakura gave him a look from under her eyelashes as she popped in the chicken she was eating into her mouth. "They're not as exciting as you though."

"Exciting, really," Sakura repeated, smirking slightly.

Shisui hummed in agreement, his lone eye twinkling as he bit into the chicken he had stolen from her plate. "I'm a masochist," he drawled in between bites. "None of them quite have your explosive temper."

Sakura stilled and she glared at him, her eyebrow twitching. The chopsticks in her hand snapped into two and Shisui's eyebrows shot up.

He grinned and dropped his own chopsticks beside his plate. He lifted his hand and propped up his chin.

"Oooh," he purred, "Show me some of that Sakura fire now." No one challenged him like she did, no one kept his interest as long as her.

Sakura threw the broken chopstick at his face and Shisui dodged it. With a thud, it buried into the wall behind him, cracks forming in the plaster. He turned back to face her, both their eyes wide.

"Okay, time to go," Shisui hissed. Sakura nodded frantically. He grabbed onto her hand and Sakura shoved the last piece of chicken into her mouth, just as Shisui made half a handsign and flickered away.

"Hey!" The owner yelled.

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"I can't believe we're getting married," Sakura said in wonder, eyeing her ring with a pleased smile. Shisui smiled, his eyes drawn to the glint.

"You're welcome," he smirked. "I did the world an honor by braving you. No one else would have you."

"I'm so lucky," Sakura agreed sarcastically, as dryly as possible. "What a joy to be stuck with you forever."

"You think so?" Shisui grinned. "Thank you."

She huffed and punched his shoulder. With an amused laugh, Shisui rolled on top of her and pinned her down. Sakura let him, her own eyes twinkling slightly with amusement.

"I love you," Shisui said seriously.

"You're obligated to," Sakura replied. She smiled, and it was beautiful. She was glowing today, the look of someone newly engaged. At 21, Sakura had finally grown into her forehead, and Shisui had finally managed to convince her to get a haircut that suited her. It's not like Shisui never found her pretty. He did, sometimes, when she was put together or when she smiled or laughed or when she was made up for the night. But it wasn't her beauty that made him love her.

"You're supposed to say I love you back," Shisui sniffed and Sakura snorted.

"Maybe later."

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"I'm jealous, Shisui-san," Lee sighed, a tear escaping from his eye. "Sakura is perfect and you are very lucky to have her."

He sniffed and then gave a thumbs up. "I trust that you'll treat her well."

Shisui smiled awkwardly and nodded. Perfect, huh. He glanced at Sakura and saw her snort with laughter, spraying her drink from her nose. He stifled a laugh.

Sakura was far from perfect. She was short-tempered, and even at 20, she still held on to her little girl insecurities about being left behind and being weak and useless. She was violent and her words were often biting and past the joking sarcasm they had never left behind.

But still.

"I love her very much," he told Lee and smiled. "I'll go see my wife now."

She was his. And he loved her for it.

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"I'm getting fat," Sakura grumbled, rubbing a hand over her belly, a slight pout on her lips as she observed her reflection from the side.

Shisui came up behind her and dropped his head on top of hers, his chin resting easily. He wrapped his arms around her, his hand covering Sakura's to pet at her belly.

"Oh no," he said dramatically, "I guess we should tell the baby to get out before he makes you even fatter."

Sakura rolled her eyes and swatted at his arm. "Shut up!"

Shisui snickered and at that, Sakura pouted and interlocked their fingers before looking up at him forlornly. "Am I getting fat?"

Shisui grinned, his gaze softening as he gave one last rub at the slight swell of her stomach. "It's okay. More of you to love."

He kissed her cheek and Sakura's lips curved into a smile, even as she tried to look offended.

Pregnancy was hard on her. Shisui suspected that if she wasn't a medic, things would be even worse. She woke up nauseous and sick, even more short-tempered than usual. Her cravings were crazy, and she demanded many, many footrubs.

She wasn't beautiful while throwing up first thing in the morning or while eating peanut butter on everything, but she was strong, and she was carrying his child. Their child. And that was so much more important.

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They say love is blind, but Shisui knew better. Even now, at the ripe age of 50, his lone eye could still see better than anyone who wasn't an Uchiha. He never abused his Mangekyou, and so his sight stayed clear.

True love sees, better than the Sharingan, better than the Byakugan. Shisui's seen Sakura at her best and at her worst, at her most beautiful and at her ugliest.

He's seen the deepest darkest parts of her, bared only to him and a select other few. He knows her secrets, her shame, her sins, her faults, and yet he loves her anyway.

He didn't love her because of them, not even despite of them.

He just loved Sakura. Each and every part of her.

He reached out and rubbed a hand over the wrinkles at the corner of her eyes and at her lips. She stirred, her eyes fluttering open.

Shisui smiled at her and she smiled back automatically, even as gunk stuck to the corner of her eyelids, her whole face groggy with sleep.

He leaned in and kissed her, uncaring of her morning breath.

She wasn't beautiful.

She was more than that.

* * *

the prompt was: ShiSaku, humour. In which Shisui and Sakura's friendship is built on sarcasm. "It must be hard with your sense of direction, never being able to find your way to a decent pickup line."

send me prompts! tumblr is linked in my profile


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